Peer Review Forum: Definition

ENG-106 Peer Review Worksheet: Cause and Effect Argument

Part of your responsibility as a student in this course is to provide quality feedback to your peers that will help them to improve their writing skills. This worksheet will assist you in providing that feedback. To highlight the text and type over the information in the boxes on this worksheet, double-click on the first word.

Name of the draft’s author: FORMTEXT Type Author Name Here

Name of the peer reviewer: FORMTEXT Type Reviewer Name Here

Reviewer

After reading through the draft one time, write a summary (3-5 sentences) of the paper that includes your assessment of how well the essay meets the assignment requirements as specified in the syllabus and the rubric.

FORMTEXT The essay has been structured into an introduction with a thesis statement in the end, 3 body paragraphs that elaborate key issues mentioned in the thesis statement and finally a concluding paragraph which summarizes the whole discussion and provides a way forward as well. The given topic has been well-researched and sources have been properly cited. A bibliography has also been added in the end. However, the use langauge is not very effective. There are many grammatical mistakes.

After a second, closer reading of the draft, answer each of the following questions. Positive answers will give you specific elements of the draft to praise; negative answers will indicate areas in need of improvement and revision. Please be sure to indicate at least three positive aspects of the draft and at least three areas for improvement in reply to the questions at the bottom of this worksheet.

Cause and Effect Argument Content and Ideas

How effectively does the thesis statement identify the main points that the writer would like to make in this cause and effect argument?

FORMTEXT The thesis statement clearly mentions three things i.e. expansion of black market, debate over regulation of organ sales and the question of dead-rule. It relates them with organ shortage in a cause-effect relation quite effectively in the body paragraphs that follow.

How successfully does the argument focus on explaining cause and effect?

FORMTEXT Although there is a lot of room for improvement of language, the essay quite effectively relates the effects with the cause. The essay is thoroughly researched and cause-effect relation is explained adequately, thereby justifying the thesis statement.

How persuasively is evidence used to justify ideas and enrich the essay?

FORMTEXT As said earlier, the essay cites several references as evidence to justify the ideas. Moreover, there is a lot of interesting information that enriches the essay.

How effectively does the essay incorporate strategies that support cause and effect arguments, namely cause and effect chains and inductive reasoning?

FORMTEXT The essay aims at justifying the cause and effect arguments by providing evidence from a number of sources. Over all, the reasoning is sound. Cause-effect chains are employed very effectively.

Organization

How effectively does the introduction engage the reader while providing an overview of the paper?

FORMTEXT Unfortunately the very initial sentences of the essay have many grammatical mistakes. However, if one bears with these mistakes, the introduction afterwards is quite engaging. The author provides a brief history of organ selling in the US. Then the main arguments are summarized, leading to the thesis statement which is mentioned at the end of the introduction.

Please identify the writer’s thesis and quote it in the box below.

FORMTEXT An escalate in the black market, debates about legalizing the sale of organs, and questions about if the dead donor rule should be abandoned are all caused by the organ shortage around the world.

How effectively do the paragraphs develop the topic sentence and advance the essay’s ideas?

FORMTEXT The body paragraphs correspond to the thesis statement. One of the strengths of the essay is its structuring. All the body paragraphs have clear topical sentences. The ideas within these paragraphs are substantiated by supporting evidence from varied sources.

How effectively does the conclusion provide a strong, satisfying ending, not a mere summary of the essay?

FORMTEXT The conclusion not only summarizes the essay, it also provides a way forward to deal with the situation. However, the length of the conclusion is not in proportion to other paragaphs. Some statistics have also been used in the conclusion. Nevertheless it is an engaging conclusion.

Format

How closely does the paper follow GCU formatting style? Is it double-spaced in 12 pt. Times New Roman font? Does it have 1" margins? Does it use headers (page numbers using appropriate header function)? Does it have a proper heading (with student’s name, date, course, and instructor’s name)?

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Add optional clarification here

Are all information, quotations, and borrowed ideas cited in parenthetical GCU format?

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Add optional clarification here

Are all sources listed on the references page in GCU format?

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Add optional clarification here

Is the required minimum number of sources listed?

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Add optional clarification here

Language Use and Style

Are the voice and tone of the essay effective in characterizing ideas and creating the appropriate mood? If “No,” please provide examples of ineffective or inappropriate voice and tone.

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Over all the tone and voice are fine. But the writer's grip over the langauge is weak.

How effectively does the paper incorporate a variety of sentence structures that strengthen the ideas, create vitality, and avoid choppiness in the writing?

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Despite weak grip over language, the author has tried to incorporate variety and create vitality in the essay. Conneting words have been encorporated. The technique of compare and contrast has been used. An argumentative style has been employed by using words such as 'however', 'thus', 'therefore', etc.'

How would you assess the writer’s diction (i.e., word choice)? Does the writer use active verbs, concrete nouns, and precise words?

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Add optional clarification here

Grammar and Mechanics

Does the writer use proper grammar, punctuation, and spelling? If “No,” please provide examples of errors in need of correction.

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT First sentence is incorrect. Second sentence is also incorrect. The third sentence is incorrect too. The whole essay needs proofreading. Even the thesis statement has gramatical mistakes. These are many mistakes related to punctuation. For instance reason's and kidney's are written instead of reasons and kidneys.

Is the writing clear and comprehensible throughout the draft? If “No,” please provide examples in need of improvement.

FORMCHECKBOX Yes FORMCHECKBOX No FORMTEXT Due to inadequate grip over language, the essay suffers from lack of clarity. Long sentences have been used throughout the essay. Although the logical reasoning of the essay is effective and accurate, a reader has to struggle to understand the point.

Following are some of the problematic sentences:

1. An escalate in the black market, debates about legalizing the sale of organs, and questions about if the dead donor rule should be abandoned are all caused by the organ shortage around the world.

2. The illegal transplant process of buying organs seems legal by way of how it is advertised.

3. As a result, it would decrease the amount of illegal sales of organs as well as provide the means necessary for the donor’s protection. (although this sentence is clear gramatically, the author has not mentioned the cause. "As a result" of what?)

Three things that I liked about your draft are:

FORMTEXT The essay has been thoroughly researched and sources have been properly cited.

FORMTEXT The essay has been structured well into an introduction, 3 body paragraphs and a conclusion that also includes a way forward.Three issues are clearly highlited in the thesis statement and the 3 body paragraphs address each problem.

FORMTEXT All the body paragraphs have clear topic sentences.

Three things that could be improved are:

FORMTEXT There are many grammatical mistakes. Long sentences have been used at the cost structural mistakes.

FORMTEXT Moreover, there are some sentences which are ambigious and not clear.

FORMTEXT The conclusion is very lengthy. In fact it is almost double of each of the other paragraphs. This is because the author has combined the summary of the essay and the way forward both in the same paragraph.