How To Deal With Conflict Between Friends
Interpersonal communication (Conflict)
Friendship, that is a soul in two bodies," says the Greek philosopher Aristotle. Most people, however, have the experience: Even in the best friendships, it is not without conflicts. Here are a few tips on how to do justice to yourself and your girlfriend / boyfriend and how to resolve complicated issues with successful conflict management. Almost every conflict begins with a disagreement in a substantive issue: The opponents wrestle with factual arguments. At this first level, both usually still consider the interests of their counterparts to be as understandable and legitimate as their own.
Interpersonal communication is a rather complicated process, since it is impossible to thoughtlessly take the position of a leading dialogue, or a listener's position, it is necessary to use everything sufficiently and do it so that the next interpersonal communication would be better than the other, previous one. This is the victory and success of solving problematic issues in achieving positive results, something to strive for. According to Hood et al. “relationship conflicts happening among team members who are friends have a negative influence on team performance, however those occurring among non-friends have a positive impact on team performance” (Hood, Cruz, & Bachrach, 2017).
The use of negotiations to resolve a conflict is possible under certain conditions; the existence of interdependence of the parties to the conflict. The absence of a significant difference in the strength of the subjects of the conflict. Compliance with the stage of conflict development with the possibilities of negotiations. Participation in the negotiations of the parties that can really make decisions in this situation. Each conflict, in its development, goes through several stages in which negotiations may not be perceived, because it is still sooner or later, and only corresponding aggressive actions are possible. It is believed that it is advisable to negotiate only with those forces that have power in the current situation and may affect the outcome of the event. Gender also plays a role in conflict resolution as describe by Whitesell, N. R., and Harter, “girls seemed to be mainly sensitive to relationship differences, steadily reporting diverse responses when friends and classmates were involved”. (Whitesell& Harter, 1996).
Internal conflicts (intrapersonal) are those that we fight with ourselves. Often it is about decisions that we have to make. A typical example would be: You have to decide whether to accept a new job in another city or to apply for another job within your own company. We have to live with the feeling that the decision may turn out to be wrong. How well we do it is an important indicator of our ability to deal with other conflicts as well. Here can be distinguished: Proximity Approach Conflicts: You have two options to choose from, both of which will yield a positive result. The choice of one option excludes the other. An example would be the purchase of a winter coat, where you have to decide between two models at the end.
Avoidance Conflicts: The choice here is between two negative consequences, with at least one evil to bear. So you could describe a conflict in which one is faced with the decision whether to go out on Fridays or Saturdays, because you have to work on one of the two evenings. Avoidance Approach Conflicts: Choosing a possibility brings both positive and negative consequences. This includes, for example, if you opt for a heavily motorized car (sporty, fast). This is associated with higher costs, but this money could be used for other pleasurable or necessary purchases. In addition, there are choices in which you choose between two alternatives that have both positive and negative consequences. For example, if you have to decide between an internship at home or abroad, every decision will have both positive and negative consequences. (Stangl, 2019).
Hood, A. C., Cruz, K. S., & Bachrach, D. G. (2017). Conflicts with friends: A multiplex view of
friendship and conflict and its association with performance in teams. Journal of Business and Psychology, 32(1), 73-86.
Whitesell, N. R., Harter, S. (1996). The interpersonal context of emotion: Anger with close
friends and classmates. Child Development 67(4), 1345–1359. https://doi.org/ 10.1111/j.14678624.1996.tb01800.
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